As a summer pop song it works well, although I found myself wishing it was maybe 5-10 BPM faster, as I think the that pace would better suit the vocals, which feel slightly sluggish at the current tempo. In fact, I found myself creating a remix in my head as I listened. That said, in terms of the instrumentation, that works well at the current tempo and it has a nice summer vibe that would go well with a strong cocktail on a beach at sunset.
Love the mood of the song, very cool vibe! Overall there were some transitions where I feel like some cool vocals FX could of been used to make it flow a little bit more.. Also some small timing issues with the vocals against the track.. Almost felt like the vocals were recorded and the track was put together afterwards it didn't exactly sit naturally. Love the tone of the vocal. On the promotion side check out Feature.FM and some small boutique PR firms to help Blog coverage and getting the song added to Spotify Playlists.. Hit up Ilya at ---> http://www.pendulumpr.com/ I'd love to hear more stuff.
Oh, it's not actually two SoundCloud accounts, even though Fluence showed two of your tracks as Liv and two as Olivia Grace. I love Cocteau Twins, and would love to share this, but the pitch problems rule it out. At 0:50 the guitar sounds out of tune too! Also confusing is the fact that SoundCloud says it's a demo, but it's the same as the final version on your album - I checked! The harmonies at 1:20 are particularly sour, and then the lead falls super flat on "you" and the guitar comes in flat too. That makes me think that the root problem is you don't have an accurate pitch reference when you're recording your vocals! It might help to record your vocal part with a piano patch in your headphones as a guide. I do it all the time when I track singers in my studio. With that in mind, there's no real way to fix this one unless you also Melodyne the guitar. I really enjoy the feel of the track, and the hypnotic vibe. Really strong ending too! I much prefer it to a long fade.
I see you sent me a bunch of tracks from your album! But under two accounts, and this one at least isn't linked to a Twitter account. This one definitely reminds me of Fiona Apple, and I'll mention that when I share it! It would help if you could include a short, catchy description of the song or act that's easy to copy/paste for social media sharing. That way we don't have to strain our brain coming up with something clever, and you get to choose how you're presented to the world. This is a lot more polished than your previous submissions for sure. Vocals sound SO MUCH BETTER! I'm not at all distracted by intonation issues, and can just enjoy the song and the emotion you're communicating. Again, it doesn't have the finished quality that professional mastering provides (not to toot my own horn too much). The mix isn't quite in the pocket and doesn't have that cohesive "glued" sound, but it's clearly no demo!
I love hearing your voice in a synthpop context! I agree with the first comment that your vocals are stronger and less pitchy on this one. Did the remixer Melodyne them? It works! They have an innocent girlish quality (hope you don't mind me saying that!) that I really like. There are things I'd change in the mix, but there's not much point as it's not your mix and it's already done. Still, just professional mastering would make a noticeable difference. And that ending fade is far too long, and the wrong shape. But anyhoo... Happy to share this one!
Music is good, but the vocals are sometimes on the edge of false. Need some more finetuning there. Vocals are also too loud in the mix. Productionwise there are some improvements to make imho.
A beautiful and sweet ballad. Where the track shines are the vocals and guitar giving it an old-school folk vibe to it. Love the collaboration and the Tennyson quote in the description. Great job to the two of you!
Hey Olivia! This is the strongest vocal I've heard from you yet! There aren't any obvious pitch problems until 0:34 "sea" and then some of the harmonies get a little sour. The next verse has some questionable intonation as well, but the tone is always pleasing. Piano tone is a bit brash for this type of track. I wish it were warmer and sat under the guitar rather than above it. Speaking of which, the guitar work is very nice throughout! Kudos to Telefan. Vocal levels are all over the place. Wow, it really leaps out at 2:20. Tempo fluctuates quite a bit as well. I know you're going for a "natural" kind of vibe, but the overall impression is that it's a demo. To take it to the next level, you'll need to Melodyne your vocal and/or comp together a bunch of takes from words/phrases where you nail the intonation. As much as I want to support you, I can't share this with all the pitch problems. I mean, take me for example. I'm not a great singer, but I do alright on a good day. When I have a bad day, I pack up and try again the next. Then I spend hours piecing together the best material and tweaking it to get a passable vocal track. I still don't sound like an amazing singer, but there are no painfully obvious flaws. The emotion of the song comes through (I'd like to think), without distracting the listener. I think you've got more potential as a singer than I do, but it's not coming through in your recordings yet. Fixing that is absolutely the next step. Until the intonation problems in your vocals are addressed, you won't be taken seriously. A little hard love from Brian 😜. Take it to heart!
I like this though it definitely feels a bit disjointed and like an incomplete piece. Personally I think if you added other layers of piano and/or some background ambience it would really allow the track to expand and breathe. Since its entitled lightning, try to capture more of the violence and harshness of the title. Nice job though and best of luck!
Was this "Steady Rain" and you changed the title? I tried to view the submission for that one, but it couldn't find it. Love that you're inspired by Debussy! And not obviously Claire de Lune, like most. 😬 Piano EQ is a little harsh, and a little heavy on the compression. Still, I think the tone of the instrument can work well. It's very intimate. Performance is sloppy at times, like around 0:40. 1:05 is jarring, especially since you don't lift the pedal to release the previous chord. Aha! The 1:29 section is clearly inspired by Claire de Lune (amiright? 😜) but it transitions quickly into something that sounds nothing like Debussy. I'm not sure what to make of it, to be honest! Some cool ideas, but nothing I can really sink my teeth into, even after a second listen. It's hard to tell if you intend it to have a strict meter, or to be a little looser. Personally, I think it should be played strictly in time, perhaps with a ritardando here and there into a new section. Regardless, you'll need to practice and clean up some of the faster sections. I'd rewrite the 1:05 section, or work on a smoother transition into it. Really cool to hear you play! I wish more people submitted solo piano to me. ❤️
Lovely arrangement. My advise would be to find a top line writer or vocalist. It could also be purely instrumental and pitched to film and TV. I feel like it would be good for PBS or a show about nature.
So now it's Liv, eh? 😜 I like it! There's a lot to like about this, but I've got to be 100% straight with you. The pitch problems are unacceptable. The very first few notes are flat, and it's occasionally painfully, cringe-ably flat. For example, at 0:43 and 3:16. That may be borderline acceptable in a live performance, but this is a studio recording. Nobody is going to look past it. The solution is to become a master at Melodyne. No shame in that! It's an art unto itself. It's not about sterilizing the performance. Rather, you want to bring about the intended emotion as poignantly as possible. It's not all bad. There's some great singing in there too! You're certainly capable of it. You just need to comp the vocals from a wider selection of takes, and Melodyne the result. Hope that's not too brutal. Believe me, it'll pay off! Brian.
I dig this. It's great underscore and I definitely will share it. The only feedback I can offer is that the mix may benefit from being EQ'd to sparkle just a touch. Are you interested in licensing your work? You should look into it!
I think this needs a lot of work. The recording was of course poor, but that's not the biggest problem here. I think your vocals definitely need some work as well. They are pretty, but they need to be developed and strengthened. I wasn't wowed by them, though I thought your phrasing and the songwriting was pretty good.
Olivia This is pretty cool overall. There are some moments in this that show your vocal potential but I do not feel like it shines that much through the whole song. The piano part has some obvious edits and sounds a bit unsure in spots. Also, there is some lyrical content that I think could be punched up a notch as it is a bit predictable (the easy as ABC's line). My advice is to make a few minor tweaks and maybe incorporate a little bit of reverb on you vocals. I'd like to know how you are recording these. Am I correct to assume that you are recording these yourself in something like Logic or GarageBand? Either way, cool song that could use some touch ups to really be what it has potential to be. As always, contact me if you have any questions or need more advice. Thanks for contacting me, take care! S.
Hey Olivia! As always, I enjoy your clever lyrics and melodic sensibility! Sorry to say though, I don't think this one is ready to share just yet. It feels like a lo-fi demo. I hear 50 (60?) cycle hum right from the beginning, which you can easily remove with a low cut filter, since there's nothing else going on that low. There's a click at 0:41, and then this weird expansion (overdub?) at 0:50, and a loud click at the end. That said, I don't think cleaning up this recording could ever get it to a professional level. It'll have to be a new recording, with better miking on the piano (or a high quality piano sample). I recommend including your lyrics both on SoundCloud and in your Fluence submissions. They are always really good, but I don't always make them all out! Congratulations on being so prolific! It's amazing how much new material you have on SoundCloud since last time. I'm jealous!
Based on all of the songs I've heard from you, I think this is the strongest one to date. I think you should continuously seek out more people to collaborate with, whether in person or online and really hustle to meet people and find someone you really click with. Go to open mics, play shows, attend local shows where you can meet fellow artists, etc. The scene in Boston / Cambridge is pretty vibrant and diverse so there is a lot of potential there. It's hard to pick up management / a label this early in the game so I think focusing on your songwriting and networking should be your main initial focus. Most managers / labels are not signing anyone off of demos in this day and age.
I like the new song Olivia! It's both haunting and playful. You're in a tough position! I really don't know how realistic it is these days to be "just" a songwriter. Even with the right connections, you need amazing demos. In other words, access to a recording studio! I've been working the past several months with someone in a similar boat. He is "just" a songwriter, paying me by the hour to produce tracks for him from scratch, using his demos as a guide. In some cases, I'm able to use the vocals he already has. In others, we plan to hire a singer. I'm even singing on some of them, heaven help us. He's never had any luck pitching the songs for others to record, so with the tracks I produce he's also going to sell them on iTunes under an artist name, and pitch the instrumentals for TV/film sync opportunities. In other words, he's becoming more than "just" a songwriter! He's maximizing his odds with the material he has. Personally, I was with Taxi many years ago, and pitched songs to many, many songwriter listings without getting a single nibble. I even won the John Lennon Songwriting Contest one year, but it's rare for an amateur to even cover one of my songs. I've since given up on that, and focused on being a recording artist. That isn't much of a stepping stone, but hopefully it puts things in perspective!
I can tell that you have talent, but I think this song needs just a bit of work. It was awkward at some points, and while it was great at others, those broken bits kind of turned the whole song for me.
Overall, I dig the song. I'm a fan of the timber of the vocals, and I dig the electric guitar lines. There are times where it sounds a bit busy and the tempo wavers, but I don't mind it too much. The mix however sounds a bit muddled. I like the addition of the electric guitars, however - there are times where the instrumental over takes the vocals which makes it difficult at points to discern the actual lyrics. Again, I LOVE the lead vocals, I just would like them to be more prominent. The last line of "Love is craaaaazy" is so endearing and sweet. I would love to hear that all the way through. I'm not saying this has to be a cajon and ukulele song, but even with just a bit more simplicity, I think the song and vocals would shine that much more. Thanks for sharing!
Hi, Thanks for sharing with us. Really like the artwork on the soundcloud link. If I were listening to this live at a gig I would be like this band isn't tight. Which is strange that i'm thinking this whilst listening to a recording. So i'm not sure if it's supposed to be like this? Either way I think it doesn't sound quite right to me. I can't work out what it is that drops out, the vocals, the drums, a lil rogue guitar. I actually think it might be a combo of all at some point or other. The bass is too high in the overall mix for me. I also think you need a few more hooks in there. A lot of the guitars kinda go off and do their own things at times, which is good but I think to make it that bit more catchy you need a few more hooks in there. This also seems that at times the instruments are kinda fighting each other and actually playing different songs. It's great to have improv and little guitar solos but the most important thing is the song as a complete body. Listen to any great song you love and really think about what makes it great. A hook, the vocal. Whatever it is, have a good study of the greats. But saying all that this has got potential for me. Just these things that jar me. I listened to your other track 'artists and excuses' and I see a lot of the problems there as well. The guitar is out of time. It's actually really hard to play guitar and sing at the same time. Yet some people make it seem so easy. These people have been playing guitar for years though, it doesn't happen over night. But you are young, you will get there as well. So I would say just keep practising. You can always record the guitar first, get all your instrumentals down and then record the vocal. But again I see potential, you have a nice voice. Like I say you're young. So don't let this put you off. I had a quick listen to 'ordinary machinery' and again same problems but it's not a bad little song. Have you tried hooking up with different producers? There's some great bedroom producers out there on soundcloud around the world looking for singers. Might be worth trying to hook up with them. Work with some different people, work together. Even if they have a different sound to what you have. You never know what you can come up with. So keep on keeping on, keep in touch with us be good to see how you develop as an artist. We see a lil diamond in the rough. Thanks again for sharing with us. Kx
I think the collaboration works here, again I think the quality of the recording could be improved. Really good lyrics. Being overly critical I would say that some parts of out of sync but its a raw delivery and i'm digging that. With bluesy types tracks its always best to try and not rush to get the job done, the start and ending was a bit abrupt and overall if you take this track down in tempo a few notches I think you would have the listener really engaged with the story. Ease your way in, ease your way out. Some nice guitar work, vocals are good the potential is there just invest in one or two tracks and get into a proper studio with a producer and you'll see the small changes that will make a dramatic difference. Keep going! C
Beautiful voice. Love the bluesy tone, and there are parts of it where the melody and harmonies soar together. All in all though, it feels like it hasn’t quite come together just yet. Sounds very raw, would need more work on production and composition to be able to be considered for radio or promotion. There are the bones of something quite wonderful here. Keep on! Thanks for your submission, good luck with your music.
Vocalist has talent but needs more development. Gets off on a few places where the key isn't hit exactly. For radio that matters. Instruments aren't tight, especially with drums and keys towards the end. Overall the song has potential but does need some more development done, particularly the execution of the instruments with the vocals and a little more growth from the vocalist on hitting notes on key throughout the track.
I really love how this is recorded...It's so simple, (I hear only three instruments and vox...could be more) yet, the sound feels really big and wide....Your voice is stunning...I love how it shakes in certain parts... It's sincere with raw emotion that reels you in...Great stuff. I am not sure if this is a whole song or just a idea for a song, but it works for me just as is... Simplicity at its best.
This feels good! I like the simplicity and I like the lyrics! Definitely something that I would listen to on a normal basis. It has huge potential and I can hear how cinematic it can be. Like i want the music to jump out at me and give me chills! I can hear areas in the track where it can do that. I think with a better mix this song can sound MUCH bigger!
I liked this but it's way too short of a song to consider promoting or to really get a grasp on what is happening here. I would love to hear an extended version of this. The production sounds like it was made on Garage Band which isn't necessarily a bad thing but if you're trying to go to the next level I would suggest improving in that area. Also you should put your music up on Bandcamp if you haven't already and I would suggest changing your Soundcloud username to your full name instead of just Liv so you're easier to find. Overall though, great start and keep up the great work!
Pretty stuff. I'd like to hear a more complete thought. This is a bit short to make any sort of statement. There aren't many musical motifs that I can latch onto. This feels a bit like an experiment than a fully formed idea. I like the chirping birds and insect noises. That's a nice combination beneath the music. However those sounds stop awfully abruptly. I would have faded it much slower more progressively. The acoustic guitar doesn't sound very much like a real acoustic. It's an interesting choice. I'm assuming it's a library guitar played via midi keyboard? I like the instrumental nature of this, but would like to hear a more complete thought. Develop this idea into a full song or movement.
I'm a huge fan of the ambient crowd of people in the beginning coupled with the sound of forest animals. Quite interesting the instrumental soundscape. Something I could see accompanying a film or soundtrack score. That being said, I could also potentially hear some vocals going over it as well. The track is simple yet evokes emotion which is a good thing. I only wish it were longer - which is also a good thing.
Olivia This is a pretty cool piece of music. I could see this being used as background music for something. It feels very improvised and open. I can't really say much about it in a negative way except that it might be able to use some more reverb to give it a bit more space. Also the crowd noise in the top and ending is a great touch. Once again thanks for sending this to me to check out. S.
Ooooh, liking the updated version, little harmonies in there sounding sweet! Well done, this sound better produced, clearer voice which attracts me to the lyrics more. Well done! PS: I still want some little shakers ;)
That was quick! This is a lot better Olivia! The recording sounds MUCH cleaner. I probably didn't mention it before, but I love way the vibraphone colors the mood. Great choice! And of course it's great that you used a higher resolution photo this time. :) There are still various pitch problems with the vocals, mostly towards the beginning unfortunately. Still, I'll go ahead and share it with my following on Twitter. I appreciate that you made tweaks based on my (and I'm sure others') feedback!
I absolutely can not argue with the premise of this song! :) It's catchy, clever, and cute. There's lots to like! But at this point, it sounds like a very raw demo. The production quality just isn't there. It's noisy and the vocals have a grainy quality at time. So it's not pleasing in a lo-fi sort of way. Performance-wise, much can be forgiven with this sort of arrangement, but there are some weird timing issues, and the harmonies are generally too loud and out of tune. Certainly nothing that can't be fixed, and I hope you will! Other random thoughts: 1. I don't know what "(Pop Edits)" means 2. Even the photo is lo-fi ;) - it's so pixellated I can't tell what it is 3. Please consider including your lyrics in the description next time - I like what I hear, but I'm not hearing all of it! It's really a pleasure to hear your development as a musician! This one is just shy of shareable at this point, but let me know if you revisit it. Thanks for sharing it with me!
Olivia I assume this is an updated version of the song you sent earlier. I like the harmonies on this. There are still some pitchy vocals in a few spots. Are you producing/recording these yourself? If not, have you ever considered working with a producer. I say this because it seems your song idea is cool but perhaps you need someone to take it to the next level and basically provide some quality control. The levels of each part are a bit better overall. Once again, let me know if you have any other questions for me. Thanks again for sharing the song! S.
It's sweet, it's simple and it's very listenable to. Got that 'Juno', 'Garden State' feeling to it. Maybe good for some indie romcom soundtrack. The lyrics didn't really jump out at me at all, but that's not necessarily a bad thing. I feel like this is a marker on the road and would love to hear where you head in your music as time goes by. Obviously it's a very simply recorded tune, and a little more instrumentation would not go amis. Altogether a sweet song, thank you for sharing. I'll post it up on my twitter for the folk to enjoy.
Hey Olivia Thanks for asking me to check out the song. I typically review these things in two ways. 1. In an overall assessment of the song. 2. A musical/technical analysis. 1. Overall I really like the song and the premise of it. It is a very quirky and fun song. They lyrics and melody were really fitting of the overall feel you were trying to convey. Also, I like that the instrumentation was very minimal. I always feel that less is more and this song, while simple, is full and natural. 2. On a technical side, there were some pitchy notes in the vocals and they seemed a bit dry and could use a bit more reverb. A bit of compression on the vocals would help them stay on top of the song a bit better too as I had a hard time hearing some of the vocals at certain points in the song. The acoustic may have been slightly out of tune but it was not so bad that it ever really took me out of the song. The vibraphone (if that is what it was...) was a bit too loud in the mix for my preference. Overall a cool song and its something I could hear being in a indie film soundtrack. Feel free to write back if you have any more questions for me! Thanks S.
I'm a fan of the vocals. Quite sweet and honest. The timing of delivery could be slightly tighter, but the content of the lyrics paint a lovely picture of a fleeting relationship or unrequited love. There are parts where the levels seem a bit off but that is perhaps a mixing issue. Over all I definitely dig the song. Looking forward to hearing how it sounds with perhaps a better more well rounded recording of it to add both depth and clarity.
This is lovely and has tons of potential. It is just not "radio ready" enough for Women of Substance. Please hit us up when you have a produced song (you can achieve a radio-ready sound wiht a home studio these days).
Very sweet. But... honestly, this sounds like a demo version to me. Please take the time to develop this. I do like the instrumentation and the harmony vocals, and I generally am a fan of that folky slightly wobbly intonation thing. It's just that the control isn't there to choose where notes bend. I'm looking forward to hearing Version 2 of this, after you've really gotten to know the song, maybe after it's been played out a tone, or maybe just comping the guitar parts so it's more even. I hope these comments are supportive, and look forward to hearing your stuff develop. Also, please do create an artist profile on our website www.AmazingTunes.com as our folk show would probably play something like this. Best wishes, Ysanne
This song needs treatment in a better studio space, and a tightening up on the guitar work. All in all there are some good potential pieces started here, but it's not a finished product. Has a demo quality to it from both production and execution of the performance. Vocalist has a light and sweet voice. There is a good composition here with a fluid arrangement, and well-crafted lyrics. However, the loose playing of the guitar leads to a distraction from the overall experience. The xylophone is a nice touch.
This is a really sweet song actually, I wasn't convinced at the start, that loud string ping 0.04 didn't fill me with any confidence but as it progressed, the piece grew on me and has a very relaxed mellow innocent vibe to it which is really nice to listen to. Technically this can be cleaned up quite a bit but it sounds like you have the platform there to build a song to the level you want it to be. The combination of the guitar and the glockenspiel / xylophone was nice but if you can, invest in some proper recording equipment and keep practicing on those few bum chords but overall, the song is actually quite good. This and 'Variable' are probably your best tracks and I would work on those to make them as close to perfect as you could and let them do the rounds and breathe rather than post every few days, just a thought. Good to hear this though I am on the third go around, thanks for sharing. Keep it up. C
Hi Olivia, Thanks for sending this through As I can hear from this, the track seems to be in a rough demo mix / ideas stage, right? I think the track idea is nice, and the acoustic elements work well. The lyrics seems well written, but your vocals really could do with some studio polish, as the whole track is a little raw, and could use a good re-record and a hot mix studio session. I think with a good engineer and studio this track has potential to sound better Not the best love song I have heard, but I do get the premise and appreciate the effort that has gone into the production. Good luck and keep on keeping on. Very best wishes -Chris
I hear potential here. The melody is memorable and the chord progression is thoughtful and not just the typical type heard way too often. This is obviously a home recording and that's okay at this point. The white noise is a bit distracting but again, understandable at this level of recording quality. You seem to have a good command over your vocal intonation and the guitar playing seems adequate and solid. So I would encourage you to seek out a professional studio and seek the guidance of a good engineer who can help you get the warm guitar and vocal sound you need to make this a pleasurable listen. Good luck with your career and your music. It's competitive out there so make sure you never release anything to the general public until it's professionally ready. These home recordings are functional as demos but always make sure you put out high-quality finished and polished songs because with the nature of the Internet, these demos will ALWAYS be around somewhere. Good start!
Olivia, first off I'd like to compliment you on a few things. You have a very pretty voice, especially when you go into your higher register. Your song is also catchy and singable, I like the use of repetition at the end of each phrase in your verse "When you're gone, when you're gone." I'm going to assume that came naturally and wasn't something you consciously did, which is a very good sign. I do have a few notes. In your first chorus you sang "Honey, if I may. I might ask you..." you took the melody into that higher register of your voice that I mentioned earlier and it sounded gorgeous (especially the vibrato on "ask you.") That is what makes your chorus stand out. I would suggest repeating that melody line in the second half of the chorus where you sing "I know you're not gonna say..." You may have to change the lyrics in order for it to fit (maybe not) but I think it needs to be there. I also noticed in your second chorus when you sang "ask you" you didn't take it into your higher register, I would sing it exactly how you did in the first chorus. Generally you want to keep the structure of your chorus the same throughout the song, it will make it more memorable. The exception to that rule would be in the third chorus after the bridge. That's when you can crank it up a bit and deviate a little from the original structure of the chorus. This leads me to my next note... I'd like to hear a bridge after the second chorus, I would suggest making sure the bridge takes the song in a different direction harmonically. They way to achieve that is to start the bridge with a chord that isn't in the song yet. Try a B minor or F major chord, I don't think I heard either of those in your song. One last thing, and I only say this because I think your voice has so much potential. Some of your notes were a little pitchy and that can be fixed with practice. Keep singing, keep writing, I think you have the potential to reach a lot of people with your music. I hope this was helpful. -Jesse
Please include lyrics with your submissions. The vocals are nice. Very pretty. Sweet timbre. Cool vibrato! Would love to hear more of that. Accentuate it! That's what sets you apart vocally. Listen to Joan Baez. She's the queen at the killer vibrato. Start with the studio recording of "Diamonds and Rust." Love the "searching for a pair of arms to call my home." "staring at the silence..." is confusing. You can't stare at silence. But I like where you took the metaphor. I like "even the bad ones help me sleep" idea, but I would change "do you ever chase your memories" from a question into more of a statement about your own memories that leads into the line "even the bad ones help me sleep." "But I need to be a little healthier" seems to come out of nowhere. It doesn't have anything to do with memories. I would have liked to hear you complete the memories thought. These four lines from "do you ever.." until "needing something more" seem to just get thrown together. Each verse should have a cohesive idea/story. Are you singing "all i taste is colder feet?" what does that mean? Who wants to taste feet? The acoustic guitar playing needs a lot of work. Definitely need to get much stronger at playing guitar before recording with it. I recommend listening to Joni Mitchell, Joan Baez, James Taylor, Cat Stevens, Carol King, Paul Simon, Ani DiFranco, John Mayer, A Fine Frenzy, Rachel Yamagata, Priscilla Ahn, and Meiko for some acoustic inspiration. Love your voice. Practice guitar every day. For hours. Listen to all the music above and write songs like those. I hear something special in you, you just need to work at it. Listening is just as important as writing and playing.
I enjoyed the song and feel you have some potential talent. The lyrics, arrangement and the description you included of the song were what stuck out to me the most as the recording quality sounds like a rough demo (which I'm sure it is) and the vocals had some moments that sounded a bit off. I can definitely hear the Death Cab influence but entirely in a good way. I would just keep writing songs, work on your voice and stick with it as this was a genuine heartfelt song. Nice work!
Hi Olivia, before I review this submission I wanted to let you know that I'm unable to play your "Seasons Go" submission from yesterday. I get a message saying the URL is not a valid Soundcloud URL. You may have to update something in your Soundcloud account. Anyhow, I really like what you have here. It's quite different from your last song, it has it's own unique sound which I appreciate very much. I think an artist's music is a product of what he/she has been exposed to and if you want to go in a more bluesy direction you totally could. I think it's always a good idea to study from the greats who came before, you can learn a lot that way. You can borrow things from them (vocal inflections, guitar licks, etc) and incorporate them into your own sound. The tricky part is making sure you don't sound too much like these artists (not saying you do, just speaking in general.) There's only been one BB King, the world doesn't need another one :) I would suggest listening to artists (if you haven't already) like Bonnie Raitt and Patty Griffin, by far two of my favorite female singers ever. Expose yourself to artists like Albert King, Son House, Robert Johnson, Lightnin' Hopkins and Muddy Waters. These are some the most influential blues artists who ever did it. When you can borrow what they did and mix it with what makes you unique, then you're really on it something. I do have a few notes. Again, I think you have a very unique voice and it sounds good in this style. I'm having a hard time distinguishing the verse from the chorus. You may have to switch up the chord progression somewhere in the song because it seems to revolve around the same chords the entire time. I also feel like this song lacks a hook, the hook is usually the main point you are trying to get across in the song, it is typically at the end of the chorus. An example of a song with a great hook is Will Hoge's "Even If It Breaks Your Heart." Everything in the song is leading up to that last line in the chorus, and when it's finally delivered, everything else in the song seems to makes sense and fall right in to place. The effects on the background vocals sound really cool but I think they are too loud in the mix. Generally you want the background vocals to be tucked away in the mix to where they are not competing with the main vocals but are still loud enough to where you could tell if they were taken out of the mix. Again, I like what you have here. I think a few tweaks can really take it to the next level. I hope this was helpful. -Jesse
I love how you took what could have been a simple vocal/blues track, and added some magic to take it to a different place. Like the "bullhorn" vocal doubling, and variety of vocal effects. I can definitely hear a little of that Lana del Rey character in there. Still, I'm wondering why you are looking for feedback from people interested in electronic and synthpop. But that's okay - I like this too! On the "needs improvement" end of things, there are scattered pitch and timing issues that keep the performance from being as tight as it could be. The vocal really leaps out of the mix towards the end around 3:50. The drums and bass are too far back in the mix for my taste. Despite those issues, I'm happy to share it with my followers on Twitter. Hope it helps!
There's a lot to like about this! Namely, the song itself. It's strong, playful, and catchy. The recording though, isn't yet up to professional standards. The vocal and snaps tend to be way too loud, but the dynamics are all over the place. It isn't mastered, but until the mix is more balanced, that won't help much anyway. I love your voice, but there are some glaring pitch problems, even in the first two lines. After that it's a lot tighter, but it doesn't make as strong a first impression as you're capable of. Bottom line, I hear a lot of potential here! You've just got to work on the production, or find a producer to work with. p.s. I listened to a few of your electronic tracks, but I'm missing your voice!